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You are here: Home / blog / Twas the night before Christmas & the Outsourcing Contract thingy

Twas the night before Christmas & the Outsourcing Contract thingy

in blog, small business owners on 12/24/14

Christmas outsourcing contract poemI had such high hopes with my wit and creative mind to duplicate Twas The Night Before Christmas, so here goes.

Hope you Enjoy. Comment at will but be gentle! Santa knows if you were nice or… not! LOL

 

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the internet
Not a computer was clicking, not even a mouse.
The favorites were bookmarked by the browser bar with care,
In hopes that Google soon would be there.

The marketers were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of Google spiders danced in their heads.
With me in my pajamas and Josh in his cap,
Had just settled my SEO brain for a short night’s nap.

When out on the net there arose such a clatter,
We sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.
Away to the office I flew like a flash,
Tore open the laptop and turned lights on with a dash.

The glare on the blank screen with the fresh computer glow
Gave the lustre of windows to eventually browse below.
When, what to my wandering eyes should appear,
But a miniature hourglass near the empty glass of beer.

With a little old hard drive, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it would appear in a click.
More rapid than foxes Microsoft finally came,
And I whistled, and shouted, and opened the applications by name!

Now Chrome, now Facebook, HootSuite and Firefox!
On Word, on Powerpoint, on OneNote and DropBox!
To the top of the Browser! to the top of the FB wall!
Now open, now open, would you hurry and open up y’all!

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an firewall, mount to the sky.
So up to the virus scans & malware bytes they flew,
With the screen full of updates and quarantines too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard as social proof
The statuses and updates friendly and aloof.
As I drew in my head, and was scrolling around,
Down the news feed came Mark Zuckerburg with a bound.

It was dressed all in blue, from the top to the foot-er,
And the birthdays of friends were listed on the rut-er (right, ran out of rhyme)
A bundle of ads were assumed from collected cookies,
And no one but them would know if you would likey.  (LOL)

An advertisers dream in Google, Facebook or Twitter, how merry!
The analytics track like clockwork, the clicks at the top like a cherry!
Add followers and fans help any business with such flow,
In hopes that the ROI is high and the expense is very low.

The stump of an ad that is getting little click thru,
Or the keyword research to add several or a few.
A negative keyword might be the key here,
No pun intended but outsource and have no fear!

An SEO/SEM marketer might be your right jolly old elf,
And to keep outsourcing your work, you might laugh at yourself!
But with a click of a mouse and a contract put to bed,
Soon we will relieve you of the stress you so often dread.

We speak much geek but will get straight to our work,
And filled out all the meta tags, then save with a perk.
To call on those Google spiders to index your site,
And hoping for increased rankings & up the SERP you might!

Wishing you to the first page (or so), to my team gave a whistle,
And onto the content and blogs like the point of a thistle.
But I saw the search engine rankings and traffic to the website,
Merry Christmas to all, thank you for outsourcing your business tonight!

Merry Christmas to you all!

~Kristen

8 Comments

About Kristen Day

Kristen is a small business owner and thus dedicated to other small business owners by helping them improve their online presence with having a professional and mobile responsive website, then implementing search engine optimization and pay per click advertising all of which are necessary 'evils' in the digital marketing sphere but enables small business owners the opportunity to compete with larger companies. When not in the digital arena, you can find her hanging with her girlfriends, husband, drinking a margarita or shooting competition (not in that order).

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Comments

  1. Holly Jean says

    12/24/2014 at 8:12 AM

    LOVE your enthusiasm! This is great, Kristen! Speaks to your techie self… I’m impressed. I hope you have a very Merry Christmas! Enjoy your holiday and lack of mouse clicking- LOL.

    Reply
    • Kristen Wilson says

      12/26/2014 at 11:23 AM

      Thanks Holly! I enjoyed doing it! LOL

      Reply
  2. Beth Niebuhr says

    12/24/2014 at 8:33 AM

    Too funny! The Night Before Christmas in Geek-Speak! Don’t quit your career to become a poet; they don’t make any money! Have a great Christmas, Kristen!

    Reply
    • Kristen Wilson says

      12/26/2014 at 11:24 AM

      Thanks Beth… it was fun and no worries, I won’t quit my career to be a poet! I know where my calling is… and where it isn’t! LOL

      Reply
  3. Roslyn Tanner Evans says

    12/24/2014 at 8:43 AM

    Oh Kristen, Oh Kristen, What do you know
    Your technical skills in this did show
    No matter what you write, say or do
    Your knowledge abounds, where I have no clue

    So all I can say, is someday I will
    outsource something that wil give me a thrill
    to free my mind and my hands too
    Creativity is really what I prefer to do.

    Reply
    • Kristen Wilson says

      12/26/2014 at 11:25 AM

      Hilarious…. love your response Roslyn and the time you took to reciprocate!

      Reply
  4. Carol Rundle says

    01/08/2016 at 1:53 AM

    This is so great, Kristen, you merry ole elf!

    Reply
    • Kristen Wilson says

      01/09/2016 at 5:35 PM

      You liked that huh, Carol? LOL Thanks. Looks like you went back in time on that one. lol

      Reply

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